CTY people... hate to be happy :)

i know. i'm a selfish selfish bbbbbb..person. i was reading everyone's posts from all you guys who just came back and i was glad you guys didnt have as fun as our year. idk why :( i guess its because i don't want anyone to forget, or stop keeping in touch. or... replace us with new CTY friends? whatever reason, and its probably a really bad one, i'm just glad everyone's back and that you all still had a great time :)

meeee, i haven't been doing too much these days. hm i saw harry potter 5 (which was pretty cool. its weird, for all HP movies, i can never tell if it was good or bad! but ron weasley is soo cute :D) and ratatouille! which was the cutest Pixar film i've seen so far.. one part i didnt like but for the most part, it was incredible for a cartoon ;) my cousin is here too and yesterday we both went to my friend's birthday party.. water balloons (and buckets too!), trampoline, DDR, and ping-pong, wchih was super funn :)

but there's something bothering me. i cant tell this to too many people, but my mom has been driving me crazy. not regular crazy, CRAZY CRAZY kind of CRAZY. rahhhh its been bad. if we're not fighting... we're probably fighting... which doesnt make sense but i dont make sense so whatevs :) wow i cant believe i just said whatevs. i've really lost it. but basically, my mom wont let me talk to my best friend (on the phone) or hang out with her! my mom thinks she lies and stuff, which she does at times but really who doesnt? (but thats a bad excuse). my mom also thinks we go crazy when we're around each other and i guess i do, but she wont give me a chance to prove her wrong. like the other day we went malling and i lost my fone in A&F. ok i'll admit that was my fault. but seriously, i feel SO bad, i mean i'd rather have my mom say i cant see ANY of my friends rather than single my bestest friend out. it makes her feel so sad :( and there's really nothing bad about her, and i told my mom i won't learn from her, but she doesnt care! she'll never get over her grudge with her. and i know nothing can break our friendship, but i'm still scared this will hurt it. like we might not be best friends anymore. and i can't do anything about that. and i was thinking. In the 10 commandments, god says to honor your parents. but how can i honor someone like my mom? or what if you have a drug dealer or a prositute or a crazy drunk as your parent? are you supposed to honor someone who doesnt even care about your welfare? i guess my situation's definitely not as crazy as that, but still. in the end, i'm just a kid. and nobody listens to kids :(